Since becoming a mom, I have felt emotionally distant from God. Whether from the sheer exhaustion of that first year of my child’s life or from simply settling into a less emotional faith, I’m not sure. So this morning as I sat down on the couch with my book, I prayed that God would simply meet me.
As I read through the one page devotional, I felt the sensation of tiny car wheels rolling up and down my legs and I looked down to see my 19-month old deeply concentrating on maneuvering his toy car on its makeshift track. This is one of those \moments that epitomizes motherhood, when even your body is the playground of your little one. And even though I often times weary of a lack of moments alone, simply to take a shower, exercise (or pee for goodness sake), I love when he drives his cars over my legs or arms.
Today as I looked down, I delighted in his concentration but even more I delighted in what it means. It means my child is so comfortable, familiar, and free with me that he doesn’t hesitate to make my arms and legs into a race track. As I looked down with sheer joy, I thought of how God must look at me not as an interruption, but with pure delight.
After planning out my to do list for the day I had an unexpected surprise. This morning my mom gave me the job of watering the outdoor plants. Between water runs to the different plants, I noticed a baby bird had fallen onto the deck. Initially repulsed by the sight of the pink and gray blob, I bent over the small creature saddened to find that he was only half dead, beaten and bloodied, gasping for breath. The poor bird was still so young that his eyes had not yet opened.
After a few minutes I decided I could not ignore him and came to his aid. I went up to my bedroom, looked up the site for the Raptor Trust, a famous bird sanctuary that happens to be located in my small New Jersey town, and found their directions for taking care of injured birds. I grabbed and old teeshirt and shoebox and headed for the deck. Checking to see if the bird was still breathing I used the teeshirt to gently lift the bird into the shoebox. I drove carefully over bumps as we headed for the Trust, hoping not to jerk the feeble life that I carried with me. At every stop I would lean over to check for the little fella’s movement.
Finally, we arrived at the Raptor Trust and I carried my shoebox to the Admittance Office. The woman in the office quickly recognized the baby bird to be a sparrow and commenting on his poor condition she hopefully brought him into the back. She told me I would not be able to check up on him because he would be unrecognizable from the other baby birds she had at the time. So, I left and drove home. As I drove in my Jeep the little adventure of my day caused me to think about God’ love. There is a verse in Matthew 10 that says this:
“9 Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground outside your Father’s care.<sup class="footnote" value="[b]” style=”font-size: 0.65em; line-height: 0.5em; font-weight: bold; vertical-align: text-top; “>[b] 30 And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. 31 So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.”
It just shows that the meager care I can give to a fragile baby sparrow can only be far surpassed by the love of God. If even I, a blundering, imperfect human, knows to take care of a baby bird that way, how much more can our perfect heavenly Father take care of our needs. God knows every sparrow that falls, even the little one that fell on my deck today. This incident today was proof to me that if God cares about one tiny, insignificant bird how much more does He care about me, His child? Even using this happening as a reminder is just proof that He wants to proclaim His unconditional love to me!